NOT Sorry
ďIím sorryĒ

Is all that I can say

Iím sorry my verbalization often is expressed in such a way
Iím sorry for being a pudtz, a jerk, so whiney, insecure
Iím sorry because I continue the apologies to endure
Sometimes Iím sorry simply for just being here
Iím sorry that when I say ďIím sorryĒ you donít find it sincere
Iím sorry Iím consumed with so much self-doubt and worry
Oh my God! Iím so sorry that Iím always so sorry!

Iím sorry, for what, that my family abused me?
Misunderstood, misconstrued, often shunned and misused me?
Iím sorry the same I allowed to flow through my life?
So that every encounter could continue on that so annoying strife

Throughout school, throughout work, throughout play and convention
Iím sorry most fools Iíve known have considered me with pretension
That I have an ulterior motive in receiving attention
Simply by the apology I continuously mention

Iím so sorry to say, oh, if they only knew
All the strong demanding verbal abuse Iíve been put through
And for all the times I in turn extended it out to whomever I would fight with
Iím so sorry for my Mother to still to this DAY be caught up in that cycle

Iíve felt regret for all those who tried to show me love along the way
Only to be told I could not connect with the intentions they relayed
To have go through hearing it be spoken from my lips every single day
And yet for that, ďIím sorryĒ is all Iíve ever had to say?

Why should so many others be subject to THAT?
By repeating the history continuing to make contact
Infiltrating with ugliness that initializing from hate
To damage the love meant in the comments I make

To clarify this issue, no need for apology should ever let depress
To my family, to my friends and to ALL my love ones I need to express
That I intend to get OVER all the dramatic bullshit thatís scarred me
Because motherfuckers are really getting tired of always hearing me say
ďIím sorryĒ

Relating this in an effort to tell those I care for
Of the fact that I intend to STOP it
I would have related it to some specific individuals
However, they insistently preferred that I drop it
Forgetting it by spitting it?
This is my experience - Yeah, I'm droppin' it
Cause when you get on the mic
Thatís what you do with a topic
Copyright 2003 (Elizabeth Anne)  FunkyButtMonkeeMusic, INC